Unagi, bacon wrapped asparagus, salmon, squid, with a fresh cucumber, tomato, & onion vinaigrette salad, and pork kimcheejjigae that’s not in the picture👌🔥🔥🍴 #LeeFamily #SundayDinner #Foodporn
Haha, guess you didn’t run into me!
Prior to my LA/Vegas trip I was doing emotionally, mentally, and physically great, but afterwards, the heaviness in my heart returned. For no apparent reason, I started feeling extremely anxious, worried and irritable. I found myself giving my poor mom hella attitude for no reason, and complaining about my life like an ungrateful piece of shiz. I wasn’t reading the bible or praying at all, and had absolutely no desire to either. I really didn’t want to go to bible study today, but I forced myself to. The moment my session ended, all the heaviness and annoyance diminished into thin air.
Just a little bit about my past few years is that I was literally a lost lamb. I was lost in the world, where sin was no longer a sin to me anymore. I was so unaware of what was going on in this world, and especially in my life. My paths were crooked and I had no idea what I was doing. I lived a repetitive life, making the same mistakes over and over again, not knowing why I felt the way I felt. I really thought I couldn’t be happy ever again. The scary thing is, once you’re so deep into sin, you don’t even realize what you’re doing anymore. You can’t differentiate between right and wrong. It’s really scary in all seriousness.
Honestly, I am so glad to be back home. I genuinely feel blessed. I thank the Lord that he has chosen and loved someone like me. I still have a longggg way to go to truly deepen my relationship and know God, but even this little baby step changed my life. I can’t even fathom what my life would be like in the next steps yet to come. Realizing that it isn’t about me took the toll away from my heart. I no longer desire things solely for myself, but to glorify God first.
Call me crazy, call me insane, call me mad. I really don’t mind. My only hope is that I can share this awesomeness with all my friends and acquaintances that are equally as lost as I was. Ya’ll are in my prayers.
I rarely go on FB (in all seriousness), but because my mom & I couldn’t sleep last night, we started looking at people’s photos to see how they were doing. That’s when I started tripping the hell out, thinking to myself that I need to go on my tumblr to delete all my past posts. After a long period of careful deliberation, I decided not to. What is there to hide? And why am I so ashamed of my past? I always had this weird fear in me, that my future could potentially be ruined from social media related stuff. And as much as that is true, I also came to the realization that I’m going to stop caring. I truly believe that God has someone amazing, proper and suitable readily prepared for me. I have absolutely nothing to worry about. I truly believe that (although I am jobless at the moment), God has a job prepared for me. I used to be far too focused on MY success, MY future, and MY life. But as of now, I want to live according to God’s plan for me, so I don’t have anything to really worry about, you see…
(Anyway, I am not gonna read through what I wrote, not only because I’m feeling lazy, but also because my mom is constantly talking to me when she clearly knows I’m writing something on my tumblr. I guess I’m not a good multitasker.)
There were definitely plenty of better & more “fun”-esque pictures of us together, but I believe this describes our relationship better. Every time I’m with this girl, it’s all shits&giggles. Never have I ever met such a giving and cool girl. Thanks again for showing me a good time. You’re forever my roomie & bridesmaid. Love you, Angela, & see you soon in NorCal😙 (at Los Angeles International Airport (LAX))